Let me start off by using the aged old cliche that “I am not a pessimist. I am a realist”. I believe that there is a God. I believe that God loves me. I believe that God cares for me and about the well-being of my children. I believe that God provides for my needs even before I realize that need. I believe that even when I feel like giving up on my faith, God has never given up on me. I believe that God is my provider and protector. I believe that God hears and answers prayers…and with that being said…
I do not believe that God has time to worry about my personal/dating life. Here’s why: I pray for safety and healing and protection from harm. I pray that I will always be able to provide for my children. I pray that my family is protected and kept safe from harm. I pray for healing. All these prayers have been and continue to be answered. Daily. For this I am grateful.
I prayed for a husband…. I got men who want to be my husband but have no sense of true responsibility. I got men who want to be husbands, just not mine. I got other women’s husbands who offered to be mine. sigh. Then I got a couple dudes who say they want to be my husband only to find out that marriage is nowhere on their life-list of ‘things-to-do’.
So, without anger, I realize that God really is an awesome parent. He doesn’t get too involved in the dating game. In a sense, I feel God basically says: “I’ll give you all you need. I’ll protect you from harm as long as you allow me. Follow my instructions. You will never be in need as long as you stay close to me. When it comes to your love-life, I am here for you. Choose wisely. When you are happy, I will rejoice with you. When your heart is broken, I will comfort you. I will continue to protect you and those kids from harm. When I see that the choice you make isn’t good for you/the kids, I will block it. If you try to go around me and force your own will, then I will allow it. The consequences are yours. Ultimately, the choice is yours. I am here when you need me.”
I feel this way because because I’ve seen really good women get ‘stuck’ with awful men. I’ve seen really good men get tangled with terrible women. And all the crying and praying doesn’t change much. “oh lord, please save my husband/wife! deliver him/her from lying/cheating/ alcoholism/drug addiction/[insert affliction accordingly] and …..nothing. Bills paid? yes. Kids loved and provided for? yes. Happy marriage? well, it depends on which spouse you ask and what day you’re asking it on. Sigh
With all the murders, rape, genocide, oppression, child abuse, slavery, war, etc. that is going on in the world, I just don’t believe that God has time to pick out a mate for me. Synonymous to a parent working, paying bills, keeping the house in order and the kids on track. I don’t have time to help you choose your boyfriend/girlfriend. Look, here are the ground rules……….. and always remember the importance of you and your feelings. Love yourself enough to know when what is being displayed is outside of love. Then without hesitation, make your exit because your safety and happiness far exceeds the “need” of having a man/woman. Follow these rules, make your choice wisely. I’m here if you need me.
I just don’t think God has the time for my dating life….