…is it that they generalize me? put me in the same category as the others? expect the same foolishness from me as that which they received from them? Why have they not realized that I am able to honor their time in their own madness and respectfully leave them be?  Why have they not realized that when they choose to take a dive into their chaotic idiocy, I will sit on my shore of contentment and wait, and when they’re done splashing around in their foolishness, I will simply meet them with the towel of peace?   Why have they not figured out that if they take an extended swim, I will get in my proverbial car and drive away to a whole other setting?  Why must I continuously show this? Prove how respectful I am to the time needed for others to dwell in their lunacy?  You ask me a question, I give you an answer, then you get mad at my truth. MY truth.  Where’s the logic in that? Or I ask you a question and you get upset because the answer you have to give forces you to see your own limitations or selfishness.  Please realize, I am not them. I’m not going to call multiple times or send a hundred text messages back to back asking ‘what’s wrong. what did I do or not do. how can I help you get through this. please talk to me’.  No. not me. Because madness is madness. it has no beginning and no ending.  It simply lays dormant until it’s triggered -like an explosive device- and then everyone in it’s path gets hurt.  I’m not standing in the way of madness to pacify your grown ass.   Watch me sit back, legs crossed, and watch you spiral. I will more than likely be right here after you get out of whatever emotions you have to go through. However, if I didn’t give birth to you, don’t expect me to hold your hand and spiral/spin/dive-in with you. Don’t expect it.  Expect me to respect your time.  Expect me (probably) to answer your call/text after you come back to logic.  Expect me to honor and preserve my own sanity.  This is key.

Why do I get the feeling that come next week, I will have to respectfully prove all this again….



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